Mom is still worrying us. She is not eating and this morning wouldn’t get out of bed. She doesn’t want to deal with her finances or decide if she wants to send any gifts to her grandchildren. I hate to push her, but with her not eating I’m afraid she won’t last long with us and then how do we get access to her bank account to pay off any final debts, we are sure to see some medical bills about R pretty soon. I hate to tell her it might be best if she added our names to her bank accounts. You’d think with my 10 years in trust law I would know how to do some of this stuff, but I just can’t remember exactly what is needed. I guess I do know, but don’t know how to approach her. She’s lost so much, I don’t want her to feel we are now taking more from her. We were supposed to go back to her apartment today to gather more of her belongings and sort through papers. She didn’t want to go today. After she got up she said she would go tomorrow, but I’m not sure she will.
I have paperwork to appeal my disability, and it overwhelms me. They want additional information but I don’t know how to get my test scores from the employment agencies. Even if they will give them to me, it won’t prove I can’t do a different job, like a theater ticket taker. Maybe I can do that, but no one will give me a chance because there are plenty of people out there with the needed experience. I applied for a job with Marriott as a guest service rep, and they turned me down. Is that proof I cannot do the job? I don’t know. I guess it’s proof I don’t currently have the skills for it. Can I submit this as proof of unemployability? Time for a lawyer, but what do I do for income while I wait for my DI hearing. My only choice right now seems to be going back to work, maybe just to prove I can’t do it. I’m willing to learn a new job, start a new “career,” but can’t do it in this economy. There are way too many unemployed to fill the few jobs available. I know I can’t drive far for work, and jobs nearby are even harder to find. I feel hopeless as well as useless, just like Mom does.