Being Angry

Having a little trouble with maintaining a calm Buddhist demeanor.  I just came home from shopping and no one was there to help me carry things in.  Turns out GS was at a friends, Son was walking the dogs and Husband was napping.  He was angry that I dropped something that woke him up.

Nap memeI’m having a hard time being sympathetic, as Husband sees no problem waking me at any time or day or night, and never apologizes.  Does it deliberately apparently.  Doesn’t care that he’s woken me.  Not even if I say something.

But he’s mad because my bringing in the groceries woke him up.

I should feel sympathetic.  We were woke up early this morning by a panicked Mom who was in the ER.  They had told her she may need another open heart surgery.  So Husband and Son ran down to see her at the hospital.  Turns out they weren’t doing surgery today.  Tomorrow they will do an angiogram and hopefully be able to help her out with a stent.

Anyway, when they came home today he was pretty worn out and immediately took a nap.  After about 2 hours I printed something.  The printer is in the bedroom.  It’s very quiet, but apparently even that noise woke him up, so he was already pissy when I left to do the shopping.  I didn’t know he was napping, and was a little pissed no one was around to carry in groceries.

Then I stopped myself and said, what difference does it make?  I am capable of carrying them from the car to the kitchen, and putting the groceries away.  No reason for assistance.  So why’d it bug me?  Because I always make sure I am ready and available to help with the groceries when Husband goes.

I am having trouble letting this go.

22 thoughts on “Being Angry

  1. We share different faiths but we ALL have those days. I know I have days where even little things make me act very un-Christ-like. Here’s hoping tomorrow is a better day.

  2. so here is what i have learned from an early age from my grandmother and it has held true for me. anger is a result of our expectations of other’s. they will not always be able to meet those expectations and thus we become angry. another thing that can bring us unhappiness is the tit-for-tat game. he did this so i did that and so why should he be angry? i had just read your last post where you shared your feelings of vacancy and i want to assure you that you are not alone and it will come and go. as for reading i don’t know how or when you would have the peace to do so. that may or may not be the issue, i am just making an observation.

    sending you love and light my friend

    1. Thank you so much for commenting. You’re exactly right, my expectations are just unreasonable and it’s better to accept them, than get angry about it.

      You say this vacancy will pass, I guess that’s what I’m not sure of. I hope so, but I guess I can’t do anything if it doesn’t, so why worry. Right?

      sending you good vibes across the miles.

  3. That’s a tough one. It your human side. It’s okay to be mad sometimes. When we are always so helpful we can’t help but expect to get a little bit of it back. Some days are just like that. I’ve starting singing that silly song to myself when I have a his say fit…you know Let It Go, Let It Go! Then I laugh and feel better 🙂

      1. Sometimes it just takes saying something to make yourself giggle. I have a perfect something for the times my dog shows cage aggression and growls and barks at me like he’s half mad. I used to get so mad and now I repeat the same thing over and over until I laugh. He thinks I’m a lunatic and guess what? I am 🙂

      1. I don’t know – lack of empathy perhaps. Another mixed day with ongoing conflict – argh! You are such a good example to me of perseverance!

  4. We can only be the good example to others, we can’t decide their path or behaving, just show them the way we feel are right for us.
    It is not acceptable to become angry at you, when he does the same about waking you up all times. Maybe you should try the same without madness or bad attitudes, for some days just to show him, what he is doing to you. Then have a good talk about what kind of behavior are acceptable among you.
    Send you positive thoughts 🙂

  5. I can see why you would be upset and I validate your feelings. 🙂 Maybe listening to the soundtrack of FROZEN can help!
    Let it go, let it go.
    I am one with the wind and sky.
    Let it go, let it go.
    You’ll never see me cry.
    Here I’ll stand, and here I’ll stay.
    Let the storm rage on.

  6. These types of resentments build and cause division. I too validate your feelings … but hopefully you and Husband can communicate about these things so chasms aren’t created. Breathe

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