This is the fourth time I’ve typed up this post. It’s been lost three times. Let’s hope this one takes. I really don’t have the energy to do it again.
It only took one trip to the shrink and one chat with the counselor and I’m back on track (for the moment). I’m writing again (I’ve been up late a couple nights). I’m on WP more. I’m doing more. Getting outside again. I’m still looking for a tai chi class. How is it I have to force myself to just go take a walk, or play with the dog. I always enjoy it so much when I do it, why would I prefer to stay in the house and play on Facebook? A physical reality seems better to me than a virtual reality. So I’m trying to participate more in the world. I guess I’ll see the counselor again.
I joined a Meetup group doing yoga on the beach in the mornings. The weather was great. The instructor was sort of the stereotyped yoga teacher, with feathers in her hair, and wearing a tiny bikini and a tarzan-style skirt. She might’ve been 5’5″ and 100 pounds! She used all the expected terms, and spoke in an airy voice. I wondered if she spoke like this all the time. I’ve only made it to one session, and enjoyed it for the most part. The instructor held the poses for a long time, and I really struggled. She may have been a bit beyond my ability, but I made it through. Then spent the next hour trying to get into my locked car. So much for the relaxation aspect of yoga. I planned to go today, but GS had a baseball game and we promised not to miss it. Luckily, they are there every day at the same time. I’ll go again tomorrow, and plan to go three times a week. I might even get to know some of the other ‘yoginis’.
We had an impromptu barbeque last night and invited GS’s playmates over for S’mores. There were 6 kids running around and four dogs (two are ours, the others belonged to our neighbor) and I get an idea of what my mother’s life might’ve looked like. I can imagine the constant state of chaos and wonder that she didn’t go crazy at a much younger age.
One of Husband’s friends brought his beautiful 26 year old daughter and her kids along. She has blonde dreads, and a rocking body. She seemed to hit it off nicely with son. Oh, I hope, I hope! At least let them date! Son needs to socialize, and she is getting through her divorce from her abusive husband across the country. She has just moved back to California and is living with her dad. Dad’s good with that for now, but I’m sure he hopes she will quickly get on her feet with a job, and friends, and her own apartment. An apartment for a single mom making $10 (or even $15) an hour is going to be hard. However, if two people shared an apartment, their money would go farther.
Well, my posts are very short lately, but I’m spending all my energy on my book and sleeping less. It’s very hard to write with a house full of activity, and staying up after everyone else has gone to bed has been great for my creativity, but tough on my body. I’m only getting 7 hours of sleep a night, and not getting my nap regularly. I really loved my two hour nap I got this afternoon! My sore muscles from yoga feel better and most of my pain is better.